Run #2730 by Nutcracker at Unknown

Hash Run Report – Bukit Gambir (Paper Chaos, Poultry Feast & Golden Nectar) The trail was heroically laid the day before by Bunny Nutcracker and General, who clearly did not anticipate that the jungle would be hosting an inter-Chapter paper festival the following day. Come run time, the ground, branches, roots, and possibly passing wildlife were covered in long paper, short paper, torn paper, and other Chapters’ logo paper. Finding Harriets’ paper was therefore less a run and more a treasure hunt for the visually gifted. In an act of desperation (or bribery), the Bunny placed her name card on trail, offering a free beer to anyone who could correctly identify our paper. Despite this extremely generous incentive, only three eagle-eyed hashers succeeded. The rest confidently followed whatever paper they saw, because at that point, hope had replaced logic. The run clocked in at approximately 5 km, though it felt considerably longer to those who followed every piece of paper they encountered. The first runner staggered back after 1 hour and 20 minutes, with the rest of the pack trickling in gradually, looking various shades of exhausted, confused, and thirsty. Thankfully, all hashers were accounted for and safely back before dark, much to the relief of the organizers and the jungle creatures. A solid turnout of twenty members assembled at Bukit Gambir, joined by two invitees and two paying guests from Kuching, who were given an authentic Penang Hash experience — complete with sweat, suffering, and eventual reward. Special mention goes to Steve and Sandra. Steve has been hashing for about one year, while Sandra had never hashed before. Despite this, she bravely attempted the run, quickly discovering that Bukit Gambir does not believe in “beginner-friendly” trails. She exited early but did not leave empty-handed, proudly earning herself a Mother Hash, courtesy of Hash House Harriets Penang. At the end of the ordeal, the Bunny redeemed herself spectacularly by laying out a feast fit for starving hashers. The table groaned under the weight of chicken chop, pasta with minced chicken, and chicken sausage, proving once again that when in doubt, add more chicken. All of this was washed down with copious amounts of subsidized golden nectar, which disappeared faster than the paper on trail. A classic run by all standards: confusing trail, heroic effort, first-time suffering, excellent food, and plenty of beer. On On (and On to the food table)! 🍻 Hash House Harriets Penang Looking Ahead A quick reminder that next week’s run will be virgin hosted by Kim Bell, better known (and forever cursed) as Ball Jangler, at Permai Shop Lots. As this will be her first time wielding the power of the chalk, cooler box, and general chaos, please turn up and support her — preferably with enthusiasm, good behaviour (optional), and a healthy thirst. Let’s show her that Hash House Harriets Penang knows how to treat a virgin host: by coming in numbers, drinking her beer, eating her food, and criticizing everything afterward. On On to Permai! 🍻